never knew there were so many nicknames for me!! why was i never creative enough to think up of these?
wondering about life and death and light and darkness. the day’s sentiments tastes like gritty gravel in my mouth and a vinegar soaked towel to smell. heaviness and large clouds looming over, ready to burst forth and pour a torrential thunderstorm, wreaking havoc on earth and in my heart. feeling swayed this way and that, and yet, tied down so i can not be free completely. how to have hope when the mood is so stifling and i can not breathe? how to explain the heaviness on and in my heart, like mercury soaked through all my pores, bringing me down… lead on my eyelids, a thorn in my throat. wondering, thinking… and in the midst of all this - hoping and praying? a black tarred figure fallen on all fours, in utter bitter darkness… the only hope caged inside, a fragile flame…
Had I the heavens’ embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet,
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams
off to see the world - how much do childhood movies affect your life later on? :)
a favorite :)
i still know the song ♪ ♫ ♪
n. a kind of melacholic trance in which you become completely absorbed in vivid sensory details—raindrops skittering down a window, tall trees leaning in the wind, clouds of cream swirling in your coffee—which leads to a dawning awareness of the haunting fragility of life, a mood whose only known cure is the vuvuzela.
from Invisible Monsters by Chuck Palahniuk
sometimes true of the greatest moments in life… as though time should slow itself down for us to catch up… hm… not the nicest thought though, i don’t like to live a life wallowing in regret.